Transgender people and people who need to switch genders

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strobro32
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Re: Transgender people and people who need to switch genders

Post by strobro32 » Sun Aug 07, 2016 3:32 pm

The child metaphor is great. I've watched my kids grow up. I've seen my friends' kids grow up. I believe the biggest part of who we are is there from birth, except for the influence a major crises helps in programing us.

I also think that identifying with a gender is not a choice. Like you, I believe almost everything else is a choice, transitioning, staying in, coming out, wardrobe, attitude, mood, religion, politics, friends, etc. We know we can not control others, just ourselves.. and most find that difficult enough.

The only real freedom we have is choice. We all choose to exist or live or suffer or be content or to change. Some like to give all the credit to a higher source. Whatever.
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Re: Transgender people and people who need to switch genders

Post by LavaRed » Sun Aug 07, 2016 9:19 pm

strobro32 wrote:The child metaphor is great. I've watched my kids grow up. I've seen my friends' kids grow up. I believe the biggest part of who we are is there from birth, except for the influence a major crises helps in programing us.

I also think that identifying with a gender is not a choice. Like you, I believe almost everything else is a choice, transitioning, staying in, coming out, wardrobe, attitude, mood, religion, politics, friends, etc. We know we can not control others, just ourselves.. and most find that difficult enough.

The only real freedom we have is choice. We all choose to exist or live or suffer or be content or to change. Some like to give all the credit to a higher source. Whatever.
I chose to live.
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Re: Transgender people and people who need to switch genders

Post by jlwilliams » Mon Aug 08, 2016 6:45 am

I hope it all works out for you, I really do. That said, I think sex reassignment is like giving an anorexic person a gastric band. Their self identity (truly believing in their core that at 80lbs they are fat) is not accurate. Surgically validating their belief isn't helping them. I read recently that the suicide rate among post transitioned people is something like twenty times the rate of the population as a whole. I can't help but think that this is a wrong way to solve real problems for people. Again, I hope this is right for you, but I can't help but think it's a mistake. It's your decision right or wrong and I wish you well with it.
Last edited by jlwilliams on Mon Aug 08, 2016 8:51 am, edited 1 time in total.

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Re: Transgender people and people who need to switch genders

Post by T-Rex » Mon Aug 08, 2016 8:01 am

Good for you Lava.
Doing something that makes you happy is priority.
If those around you have an issue with it, as regrettable and disheartening it may be, that's something they'll have to live with.
Surround yourself with friends and family that care about your happiness.
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Re: Transgender people and people who need to switch genders

Post by whiterussian1974 » Mon Aug 08, 2016 10:03 am

jlwilliams wrote:Surgically validating their belief isn't helping them. I read recently that the suicide rate among post transitioned people is something like twenty times the rate of the population as a whole.
What is the Rate for those who DON"T choose Surgery?

A Major Contributory Factor for that 20xs Rate is the way the Employers, Friends, Associates, Strangers, Shop Clerks, Family, etc react to the Change. If Society as-a-whole was more accepting of Individuality (The Foundation of the USA Experiment into Federal Republic State.), then that Rate would dramatically drop.

A caring, nurturing Environment is needed to reassure that those experiencing "aberrant" feelings; are perfectly acceptable and loved for who (not what) they are. That we are all God's Children, and need to be loved and respected as 'Sparks of the Divine' in Human Form.

The Hebrew term ADM means "from the dirt/soil" and the Aramaic means "red/rusty/ruddy colored." This is why man is "from and to the dirt." We emerge as precious Flowers who thrive and bloom under God's loving care. Or wither and wilt under Human Hate and Scorn. Stn (Satan) means "Adversary/Competitor." So anyone seeking to stunt that Growth of the Human Soul is a Child of that Adversary.

I know that no regular Contributor to this Forum holds such Desires. We all support any Long-term or New Member. Through exchange of Legal/Technical/Clerical/Moral/Spiritual and any other Form.

I am certain that even those who have expressed "Contrary" Views in this Thread, still love and support any Member's decision to better themself. And only THEY can determine what "betterment" is. "If your Eye offends you, pluck it out. If your hand disobeys, hack it off."
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Re: Transgender people and people who need to switch genders

Post by whiterussian1974 » Mon Aug 08, 2016 10:08 am

LavaRed: If you ever feel a need to relocate to a fresh Location or simply "get away" from the Turmoil of Daily Life, my Family will accept you living in our Spare Room for 6 months, allowing you to Establish yourself in N Houston. Your Girlfriend or Mom (1 or the other) is also welcome.

It's an Addition off of the Main House, but has a "communication door" into the Main Living Space such as Living Room, Kitchen, etc. But the Addition has its own 3/4 bath and space for a Kitchenette. (Microwave, counter space, and Ref. But not wired or plumbed for oven. Sorry.)
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Re: Transgender people and people who need to switch genders

Post by jlwilliams » Mon Aug 08, 2016 11:10 am

[quote="whiterussian1974
I am certain that even those who have expressed "Contrary" Views in this Thread, still love and support any Member's decision to better themself. And only THEY can determine what "betterment" is. "If your Eye offends you, pluck it out. If your hand disobeys, hack it off."[/quote]


Absolutely. My opinion is my opinion, and I owe no one an apology for that, any more than LavaRed does for theirs.

As for the suicide rate of those who don't go through transition; I don't know how the number I read was reached or how it compares to other groups. I will look, but it was a few months ago so I may not be able to locate the piece I read.

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Re: Transgender people and people who need to switch genders

Post by whiterussian1974 » Mon Aug 08, 2016 11:23 am

jlwilliams wrote:
whiterussian1974 wrote:I am certain that even those who have expressed "Contrary" Views in this Thread, still love and support any Member's decision to better themself. And only THEY can determine what "betterment" is. "If your Eye offends you, pluck it out. If your hand disobeys, hack it off."
Absolutely. My opinion is my opinion, and I owe no one an apology for that, any more than LavaRed does for theirs.
You're 100% correct. You owe noone an apology.

I'd be offended if anyone apologized for their Opinion. We each grow from reading Contrary and Opposition Posts. So please continue posting your Feelings and Thoughts on this and all other Topics. You enrich us through your Posts. :) :idea:

I (and I'm sure Lavared and all other Dependable Posters) all value and support YOUR Rights and Instinct to post. We'd be poorer for their Absence.
(I fixed the Typos in your Quote Boxes.) :mrgreen:
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Re: Transgender people and people who need to switch genders

Post by LavaRed » Mon Aug 08, 2016 11:26 am

jlwilliams wrote:I hope it all works out for you, I really do. That said, I think sex reassignment is like giving an anorexic person a gastric band. Their self identity (truly believing in their core that at 80lbs they are fat) is not accurate. Surgically validating their belief isn't helping them. I read recently that the suicide rate among post transitioned people is something like twenty times the rate of the population as a whole. I can't help but think that this is a wrong way to solve real problems for people. Again, I hope this is right for you, but I can't help but think it's a mistake. It's your decision right or wrong and I wish you well with it.
I'll open up by saying I love and appreciate dissenting opinions as much as supportive ones, because one would be foolish to only listen to that which one wants to hear.

It is true that the suicide rate is much higher amongst post- op transgender people than the regular population, but it's not because of dissatisfaction with the procedure itself which drives them to suicide. It's more the rejection and hopelessness and hate. One thing I've found is that as I get further into transition, I've become much happier with myself but at the same time the pressure from the people around me has increased exponentially. I'd be a liar if I said that doesn't affect me and make me feel guilty every day. But at the same time it's remarkable that whereas before I was fundamentally unhappy, from the inside out, now my only source of unhappiness comes from external causes. That's quite an achievement. I'd also have to mention that the suicide rate amongst pre- transition people is incredibly high, and difficult to measure because sometimes they never told anyone, so we can't know if someone was trans and took the secret to the grave.

I did actually undertake several serious attempts to "repair" my "confusion", as I thought of it at the time. I underwent conversion therapy for a few years (With a real accredited therapist, not the torture/electroshock kind). I even joined a lovely Christian group and attempted to be "healed" through God's power. Eventually realized it wasn't working, not because God can't change it (God can change anything), but simply because there was nothing to be healed. Then of course there was the ex- girlfriend who emotionally and mentally abused me for two whole years in an attempt to turn me "straight", before leaving. There's also my best friend who keeps trying to manipulate me in increasingly ugly ways, the latest of which was for me to allow him to stick me in a sleep- deprivation locker for three days before putting me in a sensory deprivation tank and feeding me LSD until I change my mind. He wasn't joking either. Said it would make the best wedding present (he gets married in about a week). I politely declined and offered to buy him an espresso machine instead.

The decision to transition, for me, was not taken easily or lightly. I carefully weighted all the options. In the end it boiled down to a survival situation. I could no longer live with myself the way I was. I've known since I can remember, perhaps about 5 or so. I've tried to hide it, change it, to man up, etc., ever since. In the end only transitioning has brought me relief.
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Re: Transgender people and people who need to switch genders

Post by LavaRed » Mon Aug 08, 2016 11:26 am

whiterussian1974 wrote:LavaRed: If you ever feel a need to relocate to a fresh Location or simply "get away" from the Turmoil of Daily Life, my Family will accept you living in our Spare Room for 6 months, allowing you to Establish yourself in N Houston. Your Girlfriend or Mom (1 or the other) is also welcome.

It's an Addition off of the Main House, but has a "communication door" into the Main Living Space such as Living Room, Kitchen, etc. But the Addition has its own 3/4 bath and space for a Kitchenette. (Microwave, counter space, and Ref. But not wired or plumbed for oven. Sorry.)

Awww! That's really really sweet of you to offer! :oops:
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Re: Transgender people and people who need to switch genders

Post by jlwilliams » Mon Aug 08, 2016 11:32 am

Sensory deprivation tank and lsd?!? Maybe recreationally, but that sounds like piss poor psychiatric advice.

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Re: Transgender people and people who need to switch genders

Post by LavaRed » Mon Aug 08, 2016 11:35 am

jlwilliams wrote:Sensory deprivation tank and lsd?!? Maybe recreationally, but that sounds like piss poor psychiatric advice.
He's a professional asshole as well as a therapist (No, he wasn't the one who gave me therapy the first time around). That's his version of wanting to torture me back into manhood.
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Re: Transgender people and people who need to switch genders

Post by whiterussian1974 » Mon Aug 08, 2016 11:40 am

LavaRed wrote: I underwent conversion therapy for a few years (With a real accredited therapist, not the torture/electroshock kind).

Then of course there was the ex- girlfriend who emotionally and mentally abused me for two whole years in an attempt to turn me "straight", before leaving. There's also my best friend who keeps trying to manipulate me in increasingly ugly ways, the latest of which was for me to allow him to stick me in a sleep- deprivation locker for three days before putting me in a sensory deprivation tank and feeding me LSD until I change my mind. He wasn't joking either. Said it would make the best wedding present (he gets married in about a week). I politely declined and offered to buy him an espresso machine instead.
WOW!!! :shock: It sounds like SERE Training. Though w Amphetamine instead of the CIA LSD-model. :P :roll: :lol:

Yes, Expreso Machine is the far better Gift. :lol:
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Re: Transgender people and people who need to switch genders

Post by whiterussian1974 » Mon Aug 08, 2016 11:43 am

LavaRed wrote:
jlwilliams wrote:Sensory deprivation tank and lsd?!? Maybe recreationally, but that sounds like piss poor psychiatric advice.
He's a professional asshole as well as a therapist (No, he wasn't the one who gave me therapy the first time around). That's his version of wanting to torture me back into manhood.
There was a 'Criminal Minds' episode that showed this at a "Conversion Camp" where youths were compelled under drugs to have sex w a Prostitute after watching 36hrs of Porn while not being allowed to sleep.

It was reminiscent of 'A Clockwork Orange.'
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Re: Transgender people and people who need to switch genders

Post by whiterussian1974 » Mon Aug 08, 2016 11:54 am

(Posted here instead of editing the prior.)
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Punitive_ ... viet_Union

This Therapy Method was pioneered by Ewen McGregor, William Sargent and others during the '50s. He practiced at a Canadian Mental Health Institute similar to St. Elizabeths Hospital or the Menninger Foundation.

Please click the Links. Very Informative.
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Re: Transgender people and people who need to switch genders

Post by LavaRed » Mon Aug 08, 2016 3:41 pm

whiterussian1974 wrote:(Posted here instead of editing the prior.)
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Punitive_ ... viet_Union

This Therapy Method was pioneered by Ewen McGregor, William Sargent and others during the '50s. He practiced at a Canadian Mental Health Institute similar to St. Elizabeths Hospital or the Menninger Foundation.

Please click the Links. Very Informative.
Sounds like the kind of stuff my friend would read about.
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Re: Transgender people and people who need to switch genders

Post by jlwilliams » Mon Aug 08, 2016 4:27 pm

whiterussian1974 wrote:
LavaRed wrote:
jlwilliams wrote:Sensory deprivation tank and lsd?!? Maybe recreationally, but that sounds like piss poor psychiatric advice.
He's a professional asshole as well as a therapist (No, he wasn't the one who gave me therapy the first time around). That's his version of wanting to torture me back into manhood.
There was a 'Criminal Minds' episode that showed this at a "Conversion Camp" where youths were compelled under drugs to have sex w a Prostitute after watching 36hrs of Porn while not being allowed to sleep.

It was reminiscent of 'A Clockwork Orange.'

Oddly enough, the counselor my wife and I have been seeing has thus far failed to recommend whores or dope as a course of treatment. I gotta bring this up at our next session......





Just had to bring some levity into the conversation. Hookers and dope exist to make people smile.

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Re: Transgender people and people who need to switch genders

Post by whiterussian1974 » Mon Aug 08, 2016 6:00 pm

jlwilliams wrote: Oddly enough, the counselor my wife and I have been seeing has thus far failed to recommend whores or dope as a course of treatment. I gotta bring this up at our next session......
Just had to bring some levity into the conversation. Hookers and dope exist to make people smile.
You might want to mention it while your wife isn't present.

Then again, there was an Episode where a Couple in Therapy was abducting teen girls and "assisting them" as a mutual Trust/Team Building exercise. :shock: While it may work, there are other problems that this type of Therapy might cause. :(
---
Whores after 36hrs of Porn and Drugs? Sounds like Sophomore Year in College to me. :mrgreen:
I guess that's why they call it "Sophomoric?" :?
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Re: Transgender people and people who need to switch genders

Post by LavaRed » Mon Aug 08, 2016 6:03 pm

I'm 100% sure that the root of being transgender is not sexual. I've had sex with girls, as a man. I enjoyed it. Lots. I am fairly certain the women I did it with enjoyed it too. Still, that did not "turn" me. It did not change my fundamental view of myself even one jot.
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Re: Transgender people and people who need to switch genders

Post by Maser » Sat Aug 13, 2016 5:11 am

So I noticed you went through the whole laser hair removal thingy. How long and expensive is the process? I myself have been thinking about getting it for quite some time now. I'm almost 27 and I have been waxing since I was 13. I find body hair disgusting and dirty and very unpleasant especially during the 105-110 degree Summer months here in CA.
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Re: Transgender people and people who need to switch genders

Post by T-Rex » Sat Aug 13, 2016 9:33 am

LavaRed wrote:I am fairly certain the women I did it with enjoyed it too.
That's the story we all tell ourselves! :lol:
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Re: Transgender people and people who need to switch genders

Post by LavaRed » Sat Aug 13, 2016 6:52 pm

Maser wrote:So I noticed you went through the whole laser hair removal thingy. How long and expensive is the process? I myself have been thinking about getting it for quite some time now. I'm almost 27 and I have been waxing since I was 13. I find body hair disgusting and dirty and very unpleasant especially during the 105-110 degree Summer months here in CA.
I am 12 sessions in so far, and will probably need a further 12 before it's all gone, but I am very happy with the results so far. I'd say I've permanently lost about 50% of my facial and body hair, and what remains is fine and no longer leaves a telltale blue shadow. Sessions are about every 60 days each. I expect the whole deal will have cost me between $2000 and $2500 by the time it ends.
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