My wife likes to watch Top Shot so we watched it together today and she commented about the guys hugging each other as she finds it strange as I do. Its not only on Top Shot but we've noticed on other programs also.
She asked why, I replied you're asking the wrong guy, I'll give my sons and daughter and grandchildren a hug when appropriate but not even a close friend I've known for 50 years, it just wasn't done.
If I'm sharing a laugh or truism with a friend we will laugh, nod our heads in agreement and shake hands but hugging never enters the picture.
What am I/we missing?
Which is why I say women hug, men shake hands.

In BACA (Bikers Against Child Abuse) EVERYONE hugs.

Hush wrote:My wife likes to watch Top Shot so we watched it together today and she commented about the guys hugging each other as she finds it strange as I do. Its not only on Top Shot but we've noticed on other programs also.
She asked why, I replied you're asking the wrong guy, I'll give my sons and daughter and grandchildren a hug when appropriate but not even a close friend I've known for 50 years, it just wasn't done.
If I'm sharing a laugh or truism with a friend we will laugh, nod our heads in agreement and shake hands but hugging never enters the picture.
What am I/we missing?
Which is why I say women hug, men shake hands.

I don't hug men. I don't really like shaking hands.

DustyJacket wrote:In BACA (Bikers Against Child Abuse) EVERYONE hugs.

So I'm guessing its because everyone agrees child abuse is a big no no, I can agree with that without the hugs. I'll shake your hand on that
But some would consider it an invasion of personal space I'd think.

I personally don't like hugging other guys, even close friends. I prefer to shake everyone's hand. But in a Latin society, close friends hug, and one must kiss women on the cheek as a greeting, so I have to put up with both, or risk being seen as a pedantic bastard.

Physical contact with non-nuclear family members feels awkward.

Some people are huggers. We have a close family friend (man) who's a cronic hugger. I try to stick my hand out for a shake, he goes in for the hug. Does it to everyone. Whatever. I don't find it too uncomfortable but it's not my way. I also have a cousin on my wife's side who has a real problem being touched. Doesn't even want women (aside from his wife) coming in for the hug. That's his thing and no one I know of has any problem respecting that.

AA and NA meetings have hugs all around. All the 'twelve step' groups seem to be. BACA is likely similar because it's a group thing. I used to occasionally go to a dojo that was hugs all around. One arm, manly style. Thought it was odd, but when we visited their place we did their thing.

Just to clarify after a proof read. I'm not saying BACA members are 'in recovery' or anything of the sort. Just compairing the closeness of members of one group to closeness in other groups.

I suppose bringing up whether the "good game" smack is ok, should be held for another thread.

In my limited observations, younger guys seem to give more hugs to non-family friend types than older guys. Seems to be a cultural shift that's happening across the nation, I blame TV. In some countries men kiss other men, at least nobody is lunging at me for a lip-lock yet.

As far as the 'good game' pat goes ... if you touch my ass my wallet had better not be there when I check for it.

doubloon wrote:In my limited observations, younger guys seem to give more hugs to non-family friend types than older guys. Seems to be a cultural shift that's happening across the nation, I blame TV. In some countries men kiss other men, at least nobody is lunging at me for a lip-lock yet.
...

It seems to have started with Gen Y'ers. Maybe because they are generally the youngest(most coddled) offspring of baby-boomers(peace/love/hippie). But I'm just making wide-brush speculations on stereotypes.

Does Hush need a hug? Seems like he brings it up because he wants some.

I think it is culture thing. I just spent three days in Puerto Rico for a funeral and EVERYONE hugs EVERYONE else. I was new on the scene and only knew three people at the funeral home viewing, it lasted from 9:30 to 12 midnight. I was no excluded from said hugging by anyone.

I can't speak to all culture sections but I have found hugging is a big thing in most churches I have visited, and that trend is growing.

My recent trip to a large college campus with all of the students returning for the semester also revaled a tendency in the younger generation to have a sort of one-arm pat on the back type hug greeting.

Well from what I gather here is that its a cultural shift with the younger generation.
As Red Buttons would say"strange things are happening".

Welcome back to 1953 Hush, sheesh.

http://youtu.be/gm-vvSfBsbA

Hey, don't knock it if you haven't lived it, the 50's were good times, none of this shuck and jive like today.

The '50s look like they were swell.

Aaw-shucks, that was nice of you

It is probably an under 30 thang.

Also in some countries girls hold hands.

The men hugging s--t has been bugging me for many years.

TV has complete strangers hugging at the slightest provocation. Its not just TV shows but "reality" TV. Even football seems to be a hugfest now days, score, every one hug, make a tackle, hug another guy. fumble the ball and get a cheer you up hug. I can't even remember hugging my father and never another guy.

Now Mongo hit the nail smack dab on the head. My father never hugged me or I him, it just wasn't done.

silencertalk wrote:Also in some countries girls hold hands.

In the Philippines, non-gay guys hold hands at times.

Maybe those two dudes I saw last week at the beach were philippinos .

DustyJacket wrote:

silencertalk wrote:Also in some countries girls hold hands.

In the Philippines, non-gay guys hold hands at times.

Common in Iraq. Its a culture of close talkers as well.
I hug family and close friends (males). And females as a rule of thumb. Im 26. A generation of men raised by mothers?

That is so strange to me. I have never hugged a male friend and could not imagine doing so.

silencertalk wrote:That is so strange to me. I have never hugged a male friend and could not imagine doing so.

You'll get a gigantic hug next time I see you.

82nd airborne wrote:

silencertalk wrote:That is so strange to me. I have never hugged a male friend and could not imagine doing so.

You'll get a gigantic hug next time I see you.

Try to get someone to get a picture of his face when you do it. We'd all like to share the moment